Lollypop Tantrum and a Talking Donkey?

When did lollipops stop becoming so important in our lives?  We all like a sugary treat every now and then, but kids seem to enjoy it more than adults.  I heard somewhere that adults and children have the same amount of taste buds, but because a child’s tongue is smaller, they get more flavor.  Whether it’s a myth or scientific fact, I think we can agree that candy is a delicious treat. My toddler could attest to that! Somewhere along the line, we outgrow the cravings for candy and begin to crave other things. Maybe money, flashy cars, fashion attire, or the new techy fads. However, my son, Neo, is still in the candy phase.

My two year old especially likes lollipops.  He first tried this delicious sugar on a stick when he got his first haircut.  The barber gave him a lollipop so he could sit through the haircut.  Unlike his older brother, Neo will not stay still. Our five year old is calm, reserved, and obedient.  We could take him to the restaurant, movies, shopping, and have no problem at all.  It was so easy, we immediately wanted another child.  But when Neo came, we were pulling our hair.  He kept us up every night the first year after he was born. Of course, as parents, we don’t like to compare our children.  God creates everyone very differently for special reasons. Praise God for Neo’s energetic spirit! It just requires a little more creativity...and physical exercise.

For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well. –Psalm 139:13-14

Lollipop Tantrum

Today, we had a meeting after Sunday service, and we were in the middle of some serious business (God’s business).  Neo kept running back and forth, persistently tugging at my arm.  I could tell he was restless and needed a nap, but we were almost done with the meeting so I dug through my purse to try and find something that will keep him occupied. I pulled out a big, red, heart-shaped, Valentine lollipop a student had given me a few days ago. It kept him busy as he worked hard to get the entire flavor out of that stick.  It was so pretty and shiny, he hardly kept it in his mouth.  He just enjoyed looking at it.  It actually kept him quiet all the way to the car where he fell asleep with the lollipop still in his hand.

I glanced back at my sleeping toddler, and he looked so peaceful snuggled in his little car seat.  I took the lollipop out of his hand, and cleaned his hand and mouth with a wet wipe.  We arrived at our next stop, ready to run some errands.  Once I took Neo out of his car seat, he began kicking, crying, screaming, and arching his back.  I tried to give him his lollipop back, but it was too late.  He smacked the candy out of my hand, and it cracked on the pavement. Everything else I gave him, he pushed away and continued to wail. Oh no! What happened to the peacefully sleeping toddler?  We had a full-blown terrible-twos tantrum!

This is the part where, as mothers, we think, “What is wrong with this kid? Is he sick? Is he ADHD? Oh no! I poisoned my child! I should have given him a carrot stick instead!”  All these thoughts begin to set in.  People are looking.  They’re probably thinking, “They must be new parents” or “That couple needs Jesus. I’d hate to be them.” Other thoughts are still rattling in my brain.  I have three loads of laundry when I get home.  It’s already three o’clock, and I didn’t wash my kids’ uniforms for tomorrow. We still need to grocery shop.  We have no food in the fridge to cook for dinner tonight. Why did I just remember the car registration expired two weeks ago? I was so angry that my human instincts tell me to slap this embarrassing kid and show him who’s boss. How dare! He’s making a fool of me!  I look at my husband, who is so calm and I want to tell him to do something, hello? 

God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble. -Psalm 46:1

I glance at my other two kids who are laughing and playing around with each other.  This tantrum does not seem to bother them. Audrey tickles Elias and looks away when he turns. He treads quickly ahead of her giggling. Audrey turns toward me and notices my distraught eyes. She smiles, and says, “Are you okay mom? I love you.” Then I see Jason holding Neo’s hand, rubbing his hair trying to soothe him.  In the moment, under my breath, I say, “Thank you, Jesus.” Immediately, I feel the presence of the Lord. And my mind is only set on how blessed I am to serve a living God. Bless the Lord!  I pick Neo up and give him the most nurturing mommy hug, wipe his tears away, tell him I love him, and redirect his attention elsewhere.  I don't know what Neo was feeling.  He's not old enough to fully express it using words, but I know he really needed the comfort of his mother. He finally stopped crying after a minute or two.

What does a talking donkey have to do with this, you ask?

Last night, Audrey and I had devotion.  We read Numbers 22, the story of Balaam’s talking donkey.  Balak, the Moab king’s son, sends officials to summon Balaam to curse the Israelites because he fears what they did to the Amorites, they will do to the Moabites.  Balaam gets on his donkey and goes with the officials, but God was angry.  God sends an angel to stand in the way of Balaam’s journey. The donkey sees the angel, and diverges to another direction three times. Upset, Balaam beats the donkey, and wants to kill him. Then God opens the donkey’s mouth and Balaam’s eyes.  The donkey expresses his loyalty, and Balaam sees the angel of the Lord.  The angel told him he would have killed him and spared the donkey.  Balaam quickly repents when he realizes this was God’s plan.

You see, sometimes I don’t understand God’s plan for me, but I trust His plan is better.  In my anger, if I react, I may miss out on opportunities to fulfill God’s purpose. If I gave into my anger and reacted to Neo’s little lollipop meltdown, I would have had a tantrum similar to Neo’s tantrum. Balaam told his donkey that he made him look like a fool (kinda how I felt), but the donkey replied, “Am I not your own donkey you have always ridden to this day.” (Numbers 22:30) If the donkey didn’t turn away, the angel would have killed Balaam.  What would happen to me if I don’t recognize the screen doors in front of my face? (read my previous post). When I call out to Jesus, and take refuge in him, he renews my strength and helps me from the unbearable moments to the minor times of trouble.

Anger is such a complex emotion.  It feels good, temporarily, to give into my anger, and punch a face or two or ten (figuratively speaking). But often times, I regret the way I handle the situation, even if the outcome turned in my favor. Yes, adults can throw some of the most horrid tantrums, maybe not over a lollipop, but over some other things.  God blesses me with anger so I may know when something's up. When I'm angry, frustrated, or distressed, I know there's a problem.  When I know there's a problem, I know God is refining me and drawing me closer to him somehow, and I need to hold fast to His word and prayer.

What causes your lollipop tantrums?  In the midst of it, does it make you wanna whip a donkey’s behind? God doesn’t give us such vivid clues like talking donkeys or visions of angels. But if we call out for Jesus and seek him daily, the voice of the donkey and the image of the angel may become clearer. Maybe we don't get our lollipop, but we witness the love of Christ in His way.